


All My Broken Heartbeats

by azneraCarenza



Series: Past and Present [2]
Category: Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: Alternate Universe - Arranged Marriage, Arranged Marriage, F/M, I mess with the plot of awakening, and also the hierarchy in ferox, i'm still bad at tagging send help, mentions of offscreen deaths, mentions of war and violence but nothing graphic, mostly anyway, so i'm sorry about that if it gets a little bit confusing, some other ships mentioned but they aren't relevant honestly, the chapter titles are just so meme-y i'm sorry, title from Distance by Christina Perri
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-13
Updated: 2018-01-12
Packaged: 2019-03-04 02:21:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 18,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13354467
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/azneraCarenza/pseuds/azneraCarenza
Summary: In a universe where Ylisse didn't ally itself with Ferox until after the war with Plegia, the Kingdoms require a public symbol of their alliance.





	1. In Which Chrom is Chromflicted

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is a birthday gift for Kari, my dear friend, my daughter, part of the Lonlissa Squad that is finally inspiring me to write something again. I love you and hope that you enjoy this... whatever this is.

“Then it’s agreed?”

Chrom looked across the table with what he hoped was as cool an expression as his tactician was managing, but he couldn’t help the turmoil he felt as he waited for a reply from the Khans of Regna Ferox. Thankfully, he didn’t have to wait long, as after a brief pause in which the two leaders shared a glance which appeared to conceal some silent conversation, they turned back to face the Ylissean envoys.

“Aye, we’re willin’ to agree to your terms.”

“On my word as East-Khan, you will have our support.”

Robin glanced at Chrom one last time, waiting for his reluctant nod to finalise the alliance they had spent several days trying to patch together.

“Very well then. As of today, our Kingdoms are allied against the forces of Valm.”

The discussions were finally closed, with all of the requisite documents and hand-shaking, and everything else that came with an alliance of this sort, but Chrom couldn’t find it in himself to join the celebrations. In all his years amongst the Shepherds, throughout the whole of the war with Plegia, he had made difficult choices, some of which had brought terrible consequences, and yet as he walked out of the room, he couldn’t help but think that this might be the worst decision he had ever made.

 

 

“Milord, my deepest apologies for daring to question you, but I have to ask if that was really necessary.”

Frederick had been part of the envoy, because of course he had. If he was so determined to protect Chrom from something as trivial as a pebble on the road, he would naturally follow his Exalt to a discussion that could have ended with yet another war, but apparently even the most dutiful knight in Ylisse had his questions about the terms laid out in the new alliance.

Robin, of course, tried to explain to Frederick that they had no choice. Their armies had been so depleted by the war with Plegia, and two years just wasn’t enough to build up new recruits, even if the people of Ylisse were recovered enough from the last war to enlist. Whether this Walhart truly believed he could conquer the world, or whether he just wanted to take advantage of the still-weakened state of their kingdom, Chrom couldn’t say, but Robin had been right when he’d suggested that they’d have to resort to asking their neighbours for aid. Neither of them could have thought that the cost would be this high, though.

“And what are your thoughts, Milord?”

It seemed that Frederick had tired of listening to Robin’s tactical explanations, and was determined to hear Chrom’s emotional reasoning. Since the knight had more or less been his and Lissa’s caretaker since they had been children, it wasn’t entirely surprising that Frederick was unsure of their plan, but all Chrom could do was turn to face him, look him straight in the eye, and fail to explain himself in any way that might justify the situation he had put his own sister into.

“Do you really think I wanted this, Frederick? After what happened to Emmeryn, even the thought of what I just agreed to is- I can’t begin to say how terrible I feel. But I did what I had to do, for the sake of my people, and I’ll have to live with it.”

Both Frederick and Robin had fallen silent, watching him with concern and a gracious lack of disapproval, but their silent support wasn’t enough to make Chrom feel any better. He’d never wanted to be Exalt, just to be the best husband, father and brother he could be, but now he’d denied his little sister the chance to make her own choices in life.

“Very well, Milord. I’m sure that this choice, hard as it was, will help bring peace to your people once more.”

“Frederick is right, Chrom. I wish it hadn’t come to this, but it was the only plan that might lead to victory.”

Chrom closed his eyes for a moment, focussing on the goal of ending these wars for good, when suddenly a thought possibly more terrifying than the image of a conqueror marching towards his kingdom struck him.

“You two can try and reason with me all you want, but I’m the one who’ll have to tell Lissa that we’ve arranged her wedding to a stranger without her knowledge.”

Robin, who hadn’t known Lissa for nearly as long as the others, just looked sympathetic. Frederick, on the other hand, was trying to look stoic, but Chrom was fairly certain he’d muttered his favourite taunt under his breath.

Pick a God and pray, indeed.

\---

“How could you do this to me!?”

Chrom ducked to avoid the stave swinging over his head, once again wishing that he’d never agreed to this particular clause in their alliance.

“I’m sorry, Lissa, I didn’t want this, but-“

“But you still agreed to it!”

This time he couldn’t move fast enough, and her stave caught his shoulder. Since she’d begun training with an axe, her strength had improved dramatically, and he was stuck on the receiving end of it for once. At least next time she swung the thing, he was prepared to grab it, and no matter how much she’d trained lately, her strength was no match for his years of swordsmanship. He wrestled the stave out of her hands, throwing it across the room with a feeling of deep gratitude that there weren’t any sharp objects nearby that she could have replaced it with.

“Please, just let me explain. Then you can hit me again, if you want.”

Lissa looked at him with an expression of pure rage, but after a few deep breaths she managed to calm herself enough to sit on the edge of her bed. Cautiously, Chrom sat down next to her, glad that she didn’t try to push him off the bed, even if she turned away from him. Still, it seemed safe enough to try and talk to her, and whether or not she was prepared to hear him out, she had to understand.

“We beat Gangrel, but the cost… You know as well as I do that the cost was too high. Now, with this Walhart on his way, we have no choice but to return to war, and we can’t win on our own. Robin is certain that this is the only way to victory, and Frederick and I agree. This is the last thing that I wanted, but the Khans demanded a public symbol of the alliance.”

“I guess that makes sense, but there must be a better idea than this. Why does it have to be me?”

Her mood was turning from angry to sulky, which was something of a relief. Lissa was still difficult to handle when she was in this bad a mood, but he was less likely to be hit over the head with something meant for healing.

“We have nothing else to offer them, or we wouldn’t need to ally ourselves with them in the first place. As far as we’ve heard, they don’t even know for certain whether Walhart will invade Ferox, and so by entering the war they’re putting themselves at risk to come to our aid. If I could offer myself, I would, but Lucina-“

“She needs her mother. I know. So you and Sumia get to live happily ever after, while I go and freeze in some other kingdom with the stranger I have to marry now.”

Lissa must have known that he wouldn’t have a response to that, and they simply sat in silence for a while. She was right, it wasn’t fair that Chrom had married the woman he loved, and had the rest of their lives to look forward to. Before he could sink any further into guilt, Lissa turned back to face him again, with a little curiosity hidden behind the upset expression on her face.

“I guess I may as well know who I’m marrying. It’s not one of the Khans, is it? I mean I hardly saw them, but they look so old…”

Chrom couldn’t help but laugh quietly at her thoughts, and even though she tried to hide it, there was a trace of a smile on her face for a moment before she went back to deliberately frowning.

“No, it’s not either of the Khans. They agree that you wouldn’t be suited for each other, and so they suggested the current champion as a more suitable candidate. After the Khans, he’s the most prominent citizen of Regna Ferox.”

Lissa just rolled her eyes at him, and for a second he was slightly afraid that he was going to get hit with something again.

“I don’t care about that stuff, I want to know about him as a person. What’s he like? Is he good looking?”

“I’m afraid I can’t tell you much, but I know he’s well respected. He’s supposed to be one of the best swordsmen on the continent, so he must be strong. As for his appearance, I didn’t get to meet him, but Khan Basilio promised that he’s attractive enough.”

That part of the discussions had been rather odd, but Chrom chose not to question it too much when he established that the man was at least respectable. Lissa seemed satisfied for now with the little information he had been able to provide, but she still looked unhappy, and it broke his heart. Realistically though, Chrom couldn’t blame her, and no matter how much they needed this alliance, if this champion was unworthy of his little sister, then Chrom would do everything he could to stop the wedding.

All he could do was hope that his interference wouldn’t be necessary.


	2. Basilio? More like Basili-no

Since Basilio had found Lon’qu and informed him of his upcoming marriage, the myrmidon had been even angrier than usual. Many of the people around him had assumed that it wasn’t possible, but he had never been so furious in his life. When he’d sworn his sword and service to the West-Khan of Regna Ferox, he’d been prepared to die for the man, but dying would be easier to bear than this fate. Apparently, there were other men amongst the Khan’s soldiers who would be more than happy to take Lon’qu’s place, so why none of them had been chosen for this duty, he couldn’t say.

Actually, that wasn’t quite true. As angry as Lon’qu was, he was still rational enough to remember how prestigious his position as champion really was, since in the unthinkable event of his Khan’s sudden death, Lon’qu would likely have to take his place, at least temporarily. In terms of rank, he wasn’t a bad match for a Princess, since they were both technically in the running for their kingdom’s thrones. In terms of personality, however, he doubted that any woman would be suited to him.

He was about to find out for sure, though, since today was the day he was due to meet his betrothed. So far, he’d spent it pacing around his quarters until Basilio had turned up to remind him to make himself presentable, but now he couldn’t procrastinate any longer. Thankfully, the Feroxi people didn’t tend to concern themselves too much with formalities, and he could at least show up in his normal clothes, with his sword at his side. If he was really lucky, then perhaps Basilio would change his mind, and he could stab a few people on his way out.

“At least try and look like you want to be here, Lon’qu.”

“And try not to kill any of ‘em, either.”

Lon’qu didn’t bother replying to that, instead choosing to glare his disapproval at the whole situation. Sadly, Basilio and Flavia were just about the only people he couldn’t intimidate by the power of his facial expressions alone, and so he was forced to stay where he was as the envoys from Ylisse entered the arena.

There were only four of them, and as just one was female, it was fairly safe to assume that she was the Princess. As they got closer, and he could actually make out her features, he supposed that she was attractive enough, for those who might care. That alone wasn’t enough to sway him, however, and so he simply waited. Thankfully, they stopped a reasonable distance away from the Feroxi party, so he could avoid contact with the woman for now, though he couldn’t escape the looks she was giving him as the groups exchanged greetings.

“Enough about us, now. This is Lon’qu, Champion of the West.”

Basilio pushed him forwards with his introduction, and Lon’qu was very aware of all of the people watching him. He wouldn’t give them the satisfaction of seeing any emotion from him in the face of meeting the women he was supposed to marry, however, and so he simply stood and waited, rather than attempting to greet them himself. After an expectant pause, which Lon’qu chose not to fill, the leader of the Ylissean group broke the silence.

“And this is my sister Lissa, Princess of Ylisse.”

The emphasis that the Exalt put on ‘my sister’ was presumably meant to come across as threatening, but really it just sounded like he was trying not to cry. Whatever her brother was feeling didn’t put the woman off, though, as she stepped forward immediately, looking at Lon’qu with an expression that he couldn’t figure out.

“So you’re the lucky guy who gets to marry me!”

There was something fake about the enthusiasm in her voice, which he understood well enough, but that didn’t stop him from stepping back as she moved closer to him. He could hear Basilio sighing with exasperation behind him, but he didn’t know what the man had expected. Lon’qu had made him aware of his situation with women, more out of necessity than anything else since working with women in battle was a distraction he couldn’t afford, and he felt betrayed.

“Hey! Wh-what did I do?”

When he didn’t respond, Basilio intervened in an attempt to rescue the situation, which was probably a hopeless endeavour.

“Don’t worry, Princess. Lon’qu here is more the strong and silent type. He’ll get used to you.”

Lissa didn’t exactly look impressed at this point, and neither did her brother, or their guards, but at least they understood how Lon’qu felt now. Get used to her, indeed. When they’d only been given a week before the wedding, to make sure that their forces could meet the armies moving in from Valm in time, somehow Lon’qu doubted that they’d live happily ever after.

Still, he’d made it through their first meeting without ruining their alliance for good, which was all that could really be expected of him. Unfortunately, he understood that there were plans in place for him to spend more time with this woman before the wedding, and during that time they would likely be alone.

There was almost nothing that he would like less.

 

\---

 

Later, when the false niceties had been addressed, Lon’qu had thought that he was free to at least spend his evening in peace. Apparently he was wrong, since as soon as he left the room, Basilio steered him into an empty one, then just crossed his arms and looked at Lon’qu with exasperation.

“Somehow, I feel like you aren’t even trying to be nice to the girl.”

“I’m not.”

Basilio rolled his eyes, but Lon’qu didn’t feel that it was justified. Perhaps he wasn’t trying to be pleasant to his supposed future wife, but he wasn’t going out of his way to be unpleasant either. He was simply indifferent to the woman, and happy to stay that way as long as she stayed a reasonable distance away from him.  

“Gods, Lon’qu, you can’t spend your entire married life avoidin’ your own wife!”

“You underestimate me.”

The stream of cursing that followed didn’t bother Lon’qu, because he understood that very little of it was actually directed at him. As frustrated as Basilio might get with him, the man remained oddly fond of Lon’qu, probably because he’d known him since he was a young boy, chased out of his childhood home by the constant reminders of his past. Without Basilio’s interference, Lon’qu knew that he’d be just as proficient with a blade, but he likely wouldn’t have had the opportunity to prove himself and be elevated to the position of champion so quickly. Now, though, he was beginning to wonder if the pride he’d found in that position was worth the trouble of this marriage.

“Look, I know what you’re thinking. You don’t want to do it, you hate women, I get it, and the last thing I wanted to do was force you into this, but will you hear me out?”

It seemed that Basilio had calmed down, and Lon’qu supposed that he ought to listen to what he had to say, no matter how much he didn’t want to hear it. He’d sworn his service to the man for a reason, and he owed Basilio more than he liked to admit.

“Say what you must.”

Before he began, Basilio took a seat on a nearby barrel of something, since that was the only real option in the storeroom they’d somehow ended up occupying, and gestured for Lon’qu to do the same. Lon’qu chose to remain standing where he was, but the Khan’s only reaction was to roll his eyes and get on with his speech.

“Those Ylisseans think we’re the superior military force, and they’re right, but these last few winters haven’t been kind. Supplies are low, half our soldiers are sick, but then you already knew all that. Hell, things have been bad enough around here that the two Khans are working together for the first time in as long as we can remember to try and fix it. What you don’t know yet is that me and Flavia both had riders turning up in the last couple of days confirming that this Walhart has set his eyes on Regna Ferox as well as the rest of the continent, and the famous Feroxi courage alone can’t hold off his army. We need this alliance as much as the Ylisseans do, and the only way to cement it for sure was the wedding, otherwise our people might not accept it. Their group beat our defences, but barely, and we can’t hold a tournament when we need both sides to win.”

As Lon’qu considered his words, he realised that Basilio must be truly desperate if he admitted there was something their armies couldn’t face. The Khan valued strength above everything else, which was part of the reason Lon’qu admired him so much, and to hear him sound so defeated seemed wrong. Despite his vague discomfort at Basilio’s distress, Lon’qu still had questions, and this seemed like his best chance of getting an honest answer.

“Why choose me?”

“You and I both know that you and the eastern champion are the only worthy matches in this kingdom for a Princess, and Flavia’s last champion was older than me and half as useful.”

Basilio grinned after that, like it would explain everything, but the expression was still strained, and it only took a few seconds of Lon’qu’s unimpressed stare to get him to give up on the light-hearted approach.

“Fine, you want the truth? You’re the only one I trust to look after our interests with this alliance. If that tactician of theirs tries to double-cross us, you’re the first person I’d want there to destroy ‘em, and if they do mean what they say, you’re my best soldier. If you really can’t do this, though, I’m not going to force you to marry the girl. I couldn’t do that, not to you.”

With that, Basilio stood up and reached out for him, ruffling his hair like the Khan used to when Lon’qu was still the boy he’d found half-starved and freezing in the snow, trying to hold off a pair of fully grown bandits by himself with a sharp stick. Lon’qu had sworn the man his service, but more than that, he owed Basilio his life. He could never repay the man for taking him in, and raising him not only into his position as champion, but to be the person he had grown into. He couldn’t let his life before meeting Basilio hold him back from repaying his debt any longer, even if he was given a chance of being released from this duty.

“Very well. I’ll do it.”

Basilio spent the rest of the evening asking him if he was really sure, but Lon’qu had made his choice. He’d marry the Princess, spend time with her if he must, for his kingdom, and for the man who cared enough to give him the choice.

It didn’t mean he had to like it, though.


	3. Training Montage

 

When Lissa had found out that she was expected to spend at least some time every day with a man who already seemed to hate her, she wasn’t exactly pleased. Sure, they were meant to be getting married at the end of the week, and she supposed that they ought to try and get along, but he just seemed so grumpy that even the thought of being around him was ruining her mood.

At least she’d managed to get rid of Frederick. He seemed even more suspicious of her husband-to-be than she did, and at first he’d tried to insist that he be there to chaperone them during every interaction. Thankfully, Robin had pointed out that planning the war wouldn’t be easy without Chrom’s second in command around, and Lissa had reminded him that she wasn’t a baby anymore. Chrom had taken her side, and so she would only have to deal with one grumpy man instead of two, which made her feel a little better.

Still, she couldn’t help but feel like she ought to be helping with the strategies too. She was the Shepherd’s most experienced healer after all, and since what happened to Emmeryn… Well, she’d certainly been more motivated in her training since the end of the war, going as far as persuading Robin to promote her so that she could wield a weapon of her own, despite all the stuffy nobles who had never seen a fight telling her it wasn’t necessary anymore. Now that she had to waste her time drinking tea or whatever with a man she didn’t even know, Maribelle would take her place representing their healers in tactical meetings, and even though Lissa trusted her friend completely, it was still frustrating.

Before she could feel any sorrier for herself, her train of thought was broken as she looked up from the teacup she’d been absently glaring at to see that there was a figure across the table from her. She couldn’t help but flinch, reaching for an axe that wasn’t there before realising who it was.

“Ok, what’s your problem? Couldn’t you have said hello or something, like a normal person?”

“My apologies. You seemed… preoccupied.”

How he’d managed to get into the room without her noticing, she didn’t now. Maybe the guy was just that stealthy, which made no sense given how tall and muscly he was. She didn’t think she’d been quite that distracted, but then maybe this whole situation was getting to her more than she’d thought. She’d promised Chrom that she’d try and make this work, though, and maybe this could be a way to help with the war effort after all, if not the kind of thing she’d expected when she’d joined the Shepherds, so she’d play nice for now.

“It can wait. So… how are you today?”

“Fine.”

She looked at him expectantly, but he didn’t say anything else. Maybe she just had to keep trying with the questions, find something he was willing to talk about.

“Do you have a favourite colour?”

“Colours are irrelevant. Practicality is all that matters.”

This was followed by another silence, and Lissa was beginning to think that her plan wasn’t going to work, but she was determined to keep trying anyway. She was nothing if not optimistic, after all.

“Umm… ok. What do you like doing in your free time?”

“I train.”

Honestly, any normal guy would be delighted to hold a conversation with her, and yet she was stuck with the worst conversationalist she’d ever met. None of her questions seemed to get him to open up, and when she tried to find out about his childhood he stopped talking altogether. Even when she tried telling him stories about herself, he barely seemed to react. It was like talking to a statue, though she was starting to think that a statue might actually be more interesting than this guy, and no matter how determined she’d been to try and get this to work, she was losing her temper.

“Hey, just ‘cause you don’t wanna marry me doesn’t mean you have to act so mad about it! I don’t wanna be here either, but at least I’m trying!”

For a moment, she thought that she caught an expression of vague shame cross his face, but he returned to his normal dumb stoic looks so quickly she could have imagined it. After a moment’s hesitation, though, he seemed to be trying to respond.

“Forgive me. I’m not comfortable- That is, I’m not used to talking to women. Or being anywhere in the vicinity of them. It’s not personal.”

“What, are women not good enough for your armies or something?”

She was trying to be bitter, but as soon as she finished her sentence, the man- Lonk, or whatever his name was, she couldn’t quite remember- seemed amused. For a moment, there was even a small smile on his face, and even though she barely saw it, it turned him into a different person completely, one she might actually want to learn the name of.

“I’m sure Khan Flavia would be surprised to hear that.”

“Oh… oh, yeah.”

Lissa felt kind of stupid after that, but the man’s smile was back, and for some reason she didn’t really want to think about, somehow that seemed to make up for it. Their talk was still kind of awkward after that, but it seemed less uncomfortable than it had felt earlier, now that she’d confirmed that he actually had some kind of personality. Probably.

She’d really have to ask Chrom to remind her what the guy’s name was.

 

\---

 

The next day of their courtship, or whatever it was supposed to be, passed without any new information being revealed about the ever-stoic Lon’qu, though she did at least definitely know his name now. On the third day, though, he asked her permission to go and train, which she found oddly sweet. It was also a huge relief, because after two full days of trying to make conversation with him she was seriously running out of topics to try.

She gave him her permission, of course, which lead to him pleasantly surprising her for the first time since she’d seen him smile. Naturally, given their interactions so far, she had assumed that he meant he’d be going alone, but after some hesitation he gestured for her to follow him to the training area built into the structure housing the arena.

“So what kind of training are you gonna do?”

“In order to maintain mastery of the blade, I must go through everything from basic drills to sparring with multiple opponents, daily if possible.”

He had already drawn his sword, and moved into a stance that she almost recognised from watching members of the Shepherds, but there was something slightly different about the way he moved that made him almost mesmerizing to watch.

“Wow, you sure are dedicated!”

“If I don’t maintain my skills, then I will become worthless.”

That was kind of a sad perspective to have on life, but Lissa understood that better than he might think. Before she’d started learning to fight, she’d felt useless plenty of times, especially during the last battles of the war with Plegia. Sure, being a healer was important, but she hadn’t been able to help when it had really mattered.

The conversation had trailed off while she was thinking, but she was happy enough to just watch Lon’qu going through his drills, admiring the fluidity of his movements. He seemed strangely peaceful while he was wielding a blade, which was pretty much the opposite of Lissa’s attempts with an axe. Even if she couldn’t manage to get him to hold a proper conversation, she might at least learn something from him.

 

 

Apparently it had been easier for both of them to spend their time in the training area, since they somehow ended up there the next day too. This time, Lon’qu had been more prepared, and Lissa would be lying if she said she didn’t enjoy seeing him in less layers than he usually wore. Even if his personality could use some work, she could have done a lot worse in terms of looks, and if anyone caught her staring then she didn’t have to be embarrassed because he was her future husband. If she pretended that she’d fallen in love with him, then the situation would probably have been a dream come true, but there was still an edge of awkwardness between them, and it didn’t get any less awkward when Lon’qu paused between exercises and happened to look over at her, and caught her staring himself.

“Can I help you?”

“No, I’m fine, don’t worry about me! Just keep doing what you were doing!”

 Unfortunately for her, this was the one time he chose not to ignore her when he had the chance.

“Do you even know what I was doing?”

“A thing? With a sword?”

There was that smile again, though it was gone quickly as a look of mild annoyance took over his features. That was the look she was more used to seeing from him, though for once it didn’t seem like it was aimed at her, which was new.

“You wield an axe, and yet you don’t know basic drills like these?”

“In case you hadn’t noticed, a sword and an axe are kind of different things.”

Honestly, she was so tired of people questioning her choice to take up the axe. Sure, she could have tried magic instead, but the sage’s robes had just been too similar to the clothes her sister had always worn. Besides, War Cleric sounded so much more awesome, and there was something really satisfying about the look of doubt in people’s eyes when she reached for an axe almost as big as she was. She had her argument all laid out and ready, but for once it seemed like she might not have to use it.

“They are different, yes, but I assume you intend to fight someone with a sword at some point.”

“I guess so?”

Lon’qu didn’t respond, instead choosing to walk over to the racks of weapons lining the edges of the room. He’d been using a proper blade for his routine, but now he seemed to be selecting a blunt training sword that would serve as a replacement, and as soon as he’d found one, he gestured for her to join him.

She walked over more out of curiosity than anything else, but as soon as she figured out what he was planning, she couldn’t help but grin. He’d directed her to the area dedicated to training axes, and instructed her to choose one, and soon he was going through each of his stances, and teaching her how best to defend herself against each one. No one had ever tried to give her actual instructions beyond handing her an axe and telling her to attack stuff with it, and not for lack of trying on her part. Apparently Lon’qu had noticed, and was wondering why she’d had so little education in the arts of war. After that, it didn’t take him long to get to the point.

“Did no one give you instruction when you took up a weapon?”

“The only person in the Shepherds who uses an axe is Vaike, and he forgets to bring his weapon to a fight half the time, so I didn’t think he’d be much help.”

That wasn’t the only reason, but Lissa was trying to keep the tone of the conversation light-hearted, because Lon’qu usually went all quiet if they tried to touch on serious subjects. Apparently he wasn’t going to be satisfied so easily this time though, since he responded a lot sooner than he normally would.

“I’ve seen that knight that follows your brother around with an axe, and fairly that I’m sure that your brother himself must want you to be prepared for battle.”

With that, he disarmed her easily despite running through that particular move with her multiple times now, and she didn’t bother picking up her weapon again. Instead, she avoided looking at Lon’qu for a minute before deciding that he may as well know, if they were going to be spending their foreseeable future together in a warzone.

“Frederick thinks I’m still a kid, and he tried to convince me to use a tome or something else ranged if I was going to insist on fighting. He says I’m ‘delicate’ and ‘a liability with a butter knife, never mind an axe’. As for Chrom…”

She sighed, and glanced at Lon’qu, but instead of looking disinterested like he usually did he seemed to be completely focussed on her. It was somehow both unnerving and reassuring, and she felt compelled to continue now she’d started. No one in the Shepherds would dare to go against Frederick or Chrom anyway, so her list of people to complain to had been dismally short lately.

“Chrom was ok with me being a Shepherd, as long as I stayed back and only got near the front lines when I was needed, and I always had to have an escort with me. I think he’s scared that if I can fight for myself, I’ll be in more danger, and after what happened to…”

The topic of her sister’s death was something that Lissa didn’t even talk to Chrom about, not since the funeral, and she definitely wasn’t ready to talk to this near-stranger about it. When she looked up at him, though, there was something almost like understanding in his eyes, and for a moment she thought he might be considering reaching out to comfort her, though he must have decided against it. Still, he didn’t instantly back away for once, and for the first time Lissa felt like he might actually have the capacity to care for someone.

“You lost someone dear to you. I understand.”

Usually when someone tried to relate to her mourning, it felt forced and honestly totally fake, but something about the expression on Lon’qu’s face convinced her that he was telling the truth. Besides, he didn’t try and offer her apologies or sympathy like everyone else, just offered his support without getting offended when she didn’t immediately thank him for it, and instead of trying to make her continue the conversation, he simply picked up her axe and handed it to her.

“Whatever their reasons, they are doing you a disservice. You have potential. It should be put to use.”

Just like that, they were back to running drills, and for once she was working with someone who wouldn’t go easy on her for being a princess, or small, or Chrom’s baby sister. Lon’qu sparred with her like they were equals, and even though she didn’t love him, for the first time Lissa thought that a life with Lon’qu might not be so bad after all.

 

\---

 

After their training session, some of the awkwardness between them seemed to have dissolved. Lon’qu still wasn’t the world’s best conversationalist, and Lissa was still easily exasperated by him, but they could at least bear to be in each other’s company, as long as they stood at least a sword’s length apart. Actually, that was the main concern on Lissa’s mind on their last free day. They were due to be getting married the next morning, and the fact that her betrothed still apparently couldn’t bring himself to touch her was ridiculous.

Frustratingly, they’d also been banned from training in some misguided attempt to get them to relax, which was clearly not helping Lon’qu at all. Khan Basilio had tried to help them out, but he seemed strangely determined for the two of them to have time alone, so he’d apparently decided that if they couldn’t hide away in the arena, they should go on a romantic walk in a nearby forest. What he’d failed to consider was that even if it wasn’t snowing for once, it was still far colder than the weather Lissa was used to, and that Lon’qu was incapable of relaxing if there was even a chance that someone might ambush the two of them. They’d therefore compromised on walking around the perimeter of the castle, where it would be much more difficult for bandits to attack them, and the residual heat from all of the fires burning inside might make the temperature more bearable. Lissa wasn’t convinced that it was working, though.

“H-how do you even live here? It’s f-freezing!”

“I’ve been here since I was a young child, so I suppose I’m used to it.”

As nice as it was to be able to have an almost coherent conversation with the man, Lissa had to wonder whether Lon’qu would ever actually tell her about his past. He’d made a couple of references to it now, and hadn’t explained anything properly, but then she supposed that she had stuff she didn’t like to talk about too. Instead of focussing on things she couldn’t fix, though, she decided to try and work on the more immediate problem.

“My hands are cold, Lon’qu…”

“What do you expect me to do about it?”

He sounded deeply suspicious, but not actually harsh. Still, he really seemed to have no idea what she was trying to hint at, so she supposed she ought to take a more direct approach.

“We’re getting married tomorrow, and you won’t even hold my hands to stop me from freezing?”

Lon’qu stopped in his tracks, and Lissa had to turn around to face him instead of being by his side. The look of horror on his face was still very present, but milder than she was used to, so she decided she may as well push her luck, if he could stop looking like he’d frozen in place.

“Please, Lon’qu? You only have to hold them for a minute…”

“I don’t know if-“

His excuse was probably going to be ridiculous, so instead of listening to the end of it, Lissa took matters into her own hands, as it were, and reached out to grab his. For a moment, she was certain that he was going to either reflexively crush her fingers, or panic and run away into the wilderness, but amazingly he did neither. Sure, he froze up and had a kind of hilariously panicked expression on his face, but he was still holding her hands, and even though it was kind of hard to tell because of the cold, she was pretty sure that at least some of the colour in his cheeks was from blushing. Whether it was good blushing or angry blushing was yet to be decided, but they were at least making progress.

“See, this isn’t so bad, is it?”

Lon’qu didn’t seem to be able to form words, but he managed to make some sort of vaguely strangled noise of response. He seemed so stunned, in fact, that when they started moving again Lissa only let go of one of his hands, and he didn’t seem to notice that they’d still been holding hands for the rest of their circuit around the edge of the castle. By the time they got back inside, Lissa was feeling very smug about it, especially when they came across Basilio as they walked in, since the Khan burst into delighted laughter as soon as he saw them.

As satisfying as that moment was, the Khan’s reaction was what finally brought Lon’qu back to reality, and it was only seconds later that he released her hand. He didn’t bother making an excuse this time, instead just glancing at her before walking off very quickly, but instead of being frustrated by him, Lissa was just pleased to have reached a breakthrough of sorts. Apparently, Basilio was just as impressed, and as soon as Lon’qu was out of sight, he looked at her appraisingly.

“How in the hell did you manage that?”

“I have my ways.”

Basilio laughed again, and Lissa couldn’t help but smile as he reached out to shake her hand in what seemed like an amused show of congratulations.

“Maybe you’ll be good for the boy after all, then.”

 

Lissa made her way back to her quarters after that, initially still pleased with her success, but the happy feeling faded the further away she got from the entrance to the castle. She’d managed to get him to hold her hand, sure, but managing to hold hands with a reluctant man the day before she would become his wife suddenly didn’t seem like much of a victory.

Later, Sumia and Maribelle and some of the other female shepherds made their way into her rooms, and she managed to play the part of the cheerful bride-to-be for the sake of avoiding their pitying glances, but she didn’t want to spend the evening gossiping and being pampered with a group of women who were almost all happily married to loving husbands.

What Lissa wanted was to sleep and not wake up tomorrow. She wanted to go home to Ylisse, she wanted time that she didn’t have, time to get to know this man who would be her husband in just a few hours, but most of all she wanted peace. She wanted an end to the wars that had taken her sister and now threatened to take her kingdom, and if this marriage was the only way to achieve it, then she would do what she had to do. At least now, she could be fairly sure that Lon’qu would respect her, if nothing else.

It wasn’t what she had dreamed her life would be like, but it would have to be enough.


	4. Glad I Crashed the Wedding

Lon’qu would have liked to think that he’d wake up feeling calm on the morning of his wedding, but that would be a complete lie. Firstly, because he hadn’t managed to get any sleep anyway, but also because he was still on edge from his interactions with Lissa the day before.

Since they’d begun training together, it had been easier to think of her as a comrade rather than just a woman, which had made it far simpler to interact with her. He’d been starting to almost consider her someone he could possibly befriend, given time, but then she had just grabbed his hands out of nowhere, and suddenly he couldn’t function anymore. There had been a reason that Basilio had been so surprised to see the two of them touching, though admittedly it wasn’t something he had brought himself to share with his soon-to-be wife.

Lon’qu was a warrior before he was anything else, and to admit that he was cripplingly afraid of getting too close to a woman would be to ruin his reputation. Years of work building respect amongst the notoriously courageous warriors of his kingdom, training for hours every single day without exception, could all be ruined in an instant if word got out that he could be defeated by such a simple flaw. Of course, to him it was the furthest thing from simplicity to resolve, but he was well aware of how it would appear to others. Even Basilio, who knew the most about Lon’qu’s past, still didn’t know for sure the origins of his problem, and he had gone to great lengths to convince the Khan that it wasn’t a subject he would accept being teased about. To suddenly have to conquer his greatest fear in under a week, and adjust to the thought that in just a couple of hours he would be permanently linked with a woman he couldn’t trust to respect his boundaries, was too much to bear.

“Hey, are you done pacing yet? In case you hadn’t noticed, we have a wedding to get to.”

“I am well aware of that.”

His agitation must have been plain in his voice, because Basilio held up his hands in mock surrender.

“No need to castrate the messenger. You agreed to this, which was very brave of you, but now you have to actually go through with it.”

Basilio meant well, but Lon’qu was still inclined to be irritable. The only sacrifice the Khan had really made for the occasion was putting on a shirt for once, which wasn’t exactly comparable to Lon’qu’s situation.

“Come on Kid, I know this isn’t what you wanted. You just gotta get through today, and then tomorrow you’ll be heading off towards battles and glory and all that.”

“With a woman at my side.”

Somehow, Lon’qu suspected that Basilio thought that was the opposite of a problem, but the Khan seemed determined to behave himself for once, and kept his thoughts to himself. Unfortunately though, he wasn’t wrong about needing to get to the wedding. Since Ferox was more focussed on warfare than worship, suitable venues for a wedding involving members of a kingdom devoted to the Divine Dragon were difficult to find, and they’d had to settle on a small chapel somewhere on the border of Ferox and Ylisse as the most appropriate option. While it wasn’t too far away, there was always the risk of running into bandits or other such threats, and so they had allowed far more time than was necessary to ensure that they arrived on time, and didn’t risk the Ylisseans thinking they’d gone back on their deal and chosen not to show up.

Somewhat disappointingly, nothing happened on their journey to delay them, and so Lon’qu was in his place in front of the altar at exactly the time he was supposed to be, and as various members of the Shepherds filed into the chapel, Lon’qu knew that the bride must have arrived as well. Supposedly, it was normal for a man to be nervous as he waited for his wedding to begin, but he doubted that most men experienced the borderline panic Lon’qu felt as the musician someone had found began to play, and the doors to the chapel opened.

Their wedding had been planned with practicality in mind above anything else, and their outfits were apparently no different. Lon’qu hadn’t thought too much about it until then, since he had been given what was effectively his normal outfit with a few embellishments for show, but looking at Lissa as she made her way down the aisle on Chrom’s arm, he supposed that it was traditional for the bride to make more of an effort. Despite that, her dress still seemed to be heavily based on her war cleric outfit, with what appeared to be practically the same top, and the same metal cage around the skirt. The only real difference his untrained and frankly uninterested eye could see was the skirt itself, which had been adapted to be floor length instead of the more practical shorter version, and then layered with other fabrics to make it seem less like an outfit made for battle and more like a gown. As Lissa reached the altar, though, Lon’qu began to suspect that she’d have been more comfortable in her standard outfit, and the expression on her face was a very fixed and clearly fake smile that didn’t falter as the ceremony ran its course.

“Do you take this woman to be your wife, to be bound together as one being under Naga’s watchful gaze as long as you both shall live?”

Lon’qu hadn’t been paying much attention to his wedding, and was a little surprised to realise that they were already reaching the part that actually required his participation. He had effectively come to the point of no return, because if he agreed now then he would be bound to the woman in front of him for the rest of his life. For a moment he hesitated before he glanced at Lissa, but she looked at him with her fake smile and a more realistically grim expression in her eyes, and nodded at him slightly. Despite their reservations they both knew their duty to their respective kingdoms, and so he had just opened his mouth to give his assent when all hell broke loose.

There had been guards posted on the outside door of the chapel, to ensure that any bandits or other threats that happened to pass by wouldn’t be able to cause any trouble, but apparently in the rush to get the wedding over with in time to meet the Valmese armies, they had neglected to plan for the creatures that the Ylisseans had named ‘risen’. Granted, there hadn’t been that many sightings of them in Ferox, so Lon’qu wasn’t entirely surprised that the guards had apparently crumbled under their attacks, but letting an axe-wielding risen get as far as crashing through the chapel doors was inexcusable. Now that the doors had been thoroughly destroyed, and the attention of the chapel’s occupants drawn to the situation outside, the wedding seemed to have been abandoned in favour of taking out the large crowd of the things threatening what little civilisation could be found in the area.

Honestly, Lon’qu had never been more relieved to get drawn into a fight, and if the look on Lissa’s face was any indication, she was outright delighted by this turn of events. Within the next few seconds, Lon’qu had drawn the sword that he’d insisted he be allowed to bring with him, and Lissa had pulled at the skirt on her dress until the extra layers of fabric that had in fact just been attached to her normal attire gave way leaving only the original design, and the two of them had begun running towards the fight. Unfortunately, that was where the problems started, since this had started off as a wedding and therefore only about half of the room had come armed, and none of the healers present had staves on hand. Lissa was one of the unlucky people who hadn’t brought (or more likely in her case hadn’t been allowed) a weapon, but Lon’qu wasn’t inclined to deprive her of what had turned out to be the best part of their wedding.

“Basilio, your axe!”

The Khan heard him over the commotion, understood what he was planning, and threw one of the smaller axes he always kept on him towards Lon’qu. Since Basilio always had at least two axes with him at any given time, and often a bow besides those, it was hardly a loss to him, and Lissa’s face broke into the first real smile Lon’qu had seen from her all day as he handed her the axe he’d caught.

“That one is designed for throwing, but it’s deadly enough. Show me what you’ve learnt.”

For a moment he was afraid she hadn’t heard him, as they had by now made it out of the chapel and into the fight, but before he could even stab anything himself, she had blocked an attack using one of the techniques he had shown her.

“Hah! Thanks, Lon’qu!”

After that, he got distracted by his own attempts to hold off the risen, but every now and then he would catch a flash of yellow fabric or blonde hair out of the corner of his eye, and he couldn’t help but smile at the sight.

 

Later, when the risen had all been destroyed, and the guests who had sustained injuries had been moved safely or seen by the healers who had gone to retrieve their staves while the people who had brought weapons fought, Chrom and the Feroxi Khans called a strategy meeting which both Lon’qu and Lissa were expected to attend. Having spent the last week being excluded from them, it was something of a relief to be invited to these things again, especially since Lon’qu was very rarely unaware of anything being planned in Ferox.

Lissa seemed perfectly at ease surrounded by the other leaders too, which he hadn’t entirely expected. She was a Princess, so of course she would be used to being around other high-ranking people in her everyday life, but based on what she’d told him of the way Frederick and Chrom reacted to her training, he had assumed that she wasn’t generally involved in these meetings. Learning that he was wrong didn’t concern him, however, since despite her occasional fits of sulkiness, she seemed to be capable of more than people might expect of her.

What neither of them were used to, however, was being the main focus of these meetings. As the conversation progressed, it became increasingly clear that the main point of discussion was whether they had time to try and hold the wedding again, which frankly Lon’qu thought was ridiculous. Their forces had already wasted enough time trying to plan the event, and now that it had failed it seemed pointless to try again when they had to prepare to march the next morning.

“We’ve established that we need some kind of show of unity between our kingdoms, and the wedding seemed like the most efficient way at the time, but now we’ve fought off a crowd of Risen together, would that not work?”

Flavia shook her head at Robin, who made a good point but hadn’t thought it through from a Feroxi perspective.

“There’s no real proof that we did it, since those risen just turn into smoke when we kill them, and the only impartial witnesses were an Ylissean priest and a travelling musician who’s already moved on. It needs to be something public, like the appearance the newlyweds were due to make.”

The appearance that no one had thought to tell Lon’qu about, and he was going to say as much when Basilio deliberately shook his head at his champion. No doubt he’d thought that Lon’qu would be even more inclined to refuse if he knew he had to make a public appearance and look like a happy husband, and for some reason the Khan thought that he wouldn’t get stabbed if he just shoved Lon’qu into the city with Lissa to face the masses. That was a conversation for later though, since the rest of the group seemed to be trying to think of another solution.

“We could proceed as planned, act as if the marriage has taken place, and hold another wedding quietly later when the war is over?”

Chrom didn’t sound enthusiastic about his idea, but it did seem like the simplest option. There were generally noises of agreement around the table, though there was one person who seemed determined to alter that plan slightly.

“If we do that, then can we cut the appearance to standing on a balcony or something like Chrom did at his wedding? We don’t have time to talk to people now, not when there’s still healing to be done, let alone organising an army to move tomorrow.”

Lissa looked over to Lon’qu to see if he agreed, and he had to hold back the gratitude running through his head long enough to nod his approval. Sadly, the discussion didn’t end there, as Flavia intervened again.

“That would be great, if we actually had a balcony on this castle.”

At least the idea wasn’t rejected immediately, though trying to work out the logistics took far longer than it should have done. Thankfully, a solution was eventually agreed to, and it was settled that Lon’qu and Lissa would be at the front of the group of soldiers housed at the castle when they marched towards Ylisse the next morning. That way, the people could see the supposedly married couple without Lon’qu having to interact with any of them. He was so relieved to have avoided the ridiculous number of awkward conversations he would no doubt have had to endure that he forced himself to follow Lissa in the direction of the infirmary, where she was helping with the last of the injuries from the unexpected battle, after they left the meeting.

“I didn’t see you get hurt, are you ok?”

“I’m not injured.”

She looked at him a little sceptically, but given his lack of visible injuries she seemed to believe him.

“Then why are you following me?”

“I felt I should- no, I wanted to thank you. For suggesting that we avoid some of our… duties.”

That got a smile, one of those real smiles that made him understand why so many of the Shepherds cared for her so much, and he felt himself relax, just a little.

“Don’t worry about it! I didn’t want to make that stupid appearance either, really. As much as I like meeting people, we have a lot of other stuff to think about right now.”

He nodded his response, and he was about to turn and leave her to continue in peace when she started to look as if she wanted to say more to him.

“Actually, I think I need to apologise to you. Yesterday when I held your hand, I really freaked you out, didn’t I? I didn’t realise ‘til later, when I was thinking about how your reaction was kinda weird. I’m sorry if I went too far…”

Her apology shocked him a little, because he had assumed that she either hadn’t noticed or cared about his discomfort, but clearly he had underestimated her once again. It hadn’t even been entirely her fault, since he hadn’t explained his reason for avoiding contact with her, and the fact that she’d thought to apologise to him was oddly touching.

“Thank you. I should apologise too, for not making it clear that I am unaccustomed to being touched so casually.”

“Then maybe I can try and help you with that! Or not, that’s ok too…”

Even though she trailed off at the end, Lissa was still smiling at him, and Lon’qu felt oddly charmed by her, which may have been the first time he’d ever felt charmed by anything. The feeling was strange, but not entirely unpleasant, and even though he was relieved by their wedding being postponed for the foreseeable future, he was glad that he could at least bear to be in her company.

 

 

The next day brought back his discomfort, however, when the army finally stopped to set up camp after travelling back through Ylisse towards the coast they were expecting the invaders to hit first. Lon’qu was used to battles, but Ferox hadn’t seen a full-on war since before he’d been working for Basilio, and so he was unaccustomed to travelling with larger military groups. The Shepherds weren’t a bad group to be travelling with, generally, most likely due to Frederick and Cordelia’s overactive organisation, but every army had its problems.

“Is there really nothing that can be done about this?”

Lissa frowned at him from the other side of the tent they were trying to put up, but he wasn’t ready to let it go.

“You heard Frederick, they didn’t bring any spare tents, and we were meant to be married by now!”

In this case, the exemplary level of organisation was the reason for Lon’qu’s distress. Apparently Frederick and Cordelia had worked tirelessly to reduce their supplies down to the bare essentials in order to make travel easier, and have more space available for rations, but as much as Lon’qu admired their practicality, he wasn’t happy about the situation it left him in.

“Did you have your own tent in the war with Plegia?”

“Of course not! Just ‘cause I’m a Princess doesn’t mean I get special treatment.”

While Lon’qu was actually glad to be fighting for a man who wouldn’t give anyone preferential treatment, even his own sister, in this case he would have been happy to hear of an exception if it got him out of this.

“Then can’t you share with them again, and leave me in peace?”

“Eww, no! I love Maribelle, but I don’t wanna go near her and Vaike’s tent now they’re married.”

Lissa shuddered vaguely at the thought, which was probably the closest she’d been to his level of discomfort since they’d learnt that they had been assigned to the same tent. At this point, he was running out of other options, and ready to resort to desperate measures.

“Then I’ll sleep outside.”

“Gods, Lon’qu, you’ll freeze!”

He’d lived in Regna Ferox for enough years to be used to whatever cold weather Ylisse could throw at him, and he meant what he said, but Lissa seemed determined to stop him from even trying. She just insisted that they finish putting up the tent before they argued about it anymore, since it was starting to get dark, and at this rate both of them would be sleeping outside.

As soon as they’d finished, though, she seemed to have had an idea, since she ran off after telling him to move their stuff inside. He did as she asked, as even if he slept outside he could at least keep his things in their tent, and so by the time she returned it was almost completely set up.

“Hey, it’s perfect! Or almost, anyway.”

She’d brought an armful of fabric with her as she made her way inside the tent, and it didn’t take him long to realise what she was planning. It was a good idea, forming a curtain down the middle of the tent that would at least give them some level of privacy, and soon enough they decided on a way to attach it to the posts holding their tent up. While they were setting it up, he noticed that the fabric seemed oddly familiar, and as they stood back to make sure that it was well attached he realised why.

“Is that from your wedding dress?”

“Maybe… This seemed like a better use for it, since it got all ripped in the fight.”

No matter how apologetic she was trying to sound, she couldn’t keep the amusement out of her voice, and he found himself smiling too. The irony of her using her ruined skirt to keep them apart rather than it being a symbol of their union wasn’t lost on him, though he had to wonder who had bothered to bring it with them.

“So, are you gonna sleep inside now?”

“I suppose this will do.”

He made his way to his side of the curtain, ignoring the smirk Lissa had on her face. Soon enough, she settled down on her side too, and if he really tried then he could almost forget that he was in such close quarters with a woman and sleep in peace.

 

 

The next couple of weeks passed mostly without incident. Lon’qu learned to coexist with Lissa, mostly by deliberately ignoring her presence in their tent at night, and continuing to train with her during the day when they weren’t fighting other, more hostile parties. Robin had begun to pair them together during battles too, and they were becoming a good team, between their increasingly complimentary battle styles and his ability to guard Lissa while she was healing.

Lissa had even made good on her threat to try and get him used to casual physical contact. He was still uncomfortable with it, but he could now avoid outright panic if she happened to push past him or lightly touch his arm, which was progress. All in all, they were managing quite well, and Lon’qu could only hope that nothing would happen to upset the balance that they’d managed to find between them.

Then, just when he thought they were safe, they found Owain.

 


	5. Too Much? - Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly this isn't what I'd intended to put in the Past and Present series at all but Owain deserves a confusing time travel story that isn't really sad. I love him.

“Blessed Mother! I have crossed oceans of time to find- Oh, forget it. I'm your kid from the future!”

When Owain had come across his parents in the middle of a battle, it had seemed too good to be true. The hell he’d gone through, the nightmare his entire life had become, everything seemed to fade away when he looked upon their faces, but it didn’t go quite as he’d imagined it would.

“Ahem… Mother? Father? Are you… are you alright?”

Neither of them replied, instead standing in front of him silently. His mother’s mouth was wide open, and his father kept glancing at Lissa and Owain in turn, like he could see the resemblance but couldn’t quite believe it. Even if their reunion wasn’t what Owain had hoped it would be, he couldn’t find it in himself to be disappointed with the moment. He’d missed his parents so much, and even seeing them again was a balm to his wounded soul-

“Oh Gods… Lon’qu… We have a kid…”

Somehow, hysterical laughter wasn’t the reaction he’d expected his mother to have when she’d adjusted to the situation, and he was really hoping for an explanation. His father was no help, though, since his expression was worryingly similar to the one that often appeared on Frederick’s face if someone offered him bear meat.

“Father…?”

“Don’t worry about him. He’ll adjust… I think?”

After that, they got caught up in the fighting again, and Owain lost track of them. No matter how much the adrenaline of battle coursed through his body, energising his sword hand to carry him to victory, it was hard to give it all of his focus when he hadn’t even told them his name.

 

By the time the fighting was over, it seemed that his parents had managed to get separated too, since his father was nowhere to be seen. Still, he could see his mother over by one of the buildings, and he was walking towards her when a figure stepped out behind her, and Owain broke into a run.

“Keh heh! Let's have all your coin girly! Unless you wanna lose that pretty head.”

“Stay back!”

He was close enough to hear them, but he was still running when the ruffian tried to take a swing at his mother. She managed to block it with the handle of her axe, but the weapon splintered and gave way under the pressure. Lissa was knocked to the ground, and determination surged through his body as he finally got close enough to act.

“No one hurts the mother of the Scion of Legend! SACRED...STOOOOOONES!”

The ruffian was taken care of before Lissa had even made it up from the ground, and Owain offered her his hand. She gave him a strange look, but accepted his help, and soon enough she was back on her feet, seemingly unharmed.

“Mother, are you all right?!”

“Yeah, I'm fine. I'm... Holy crow! Your arm!”

She was staring at his arm with an expression that he assumed was alarm, and he glanced at it to see what the problem was. As far as he could tell, nothing had been harmed but his clothing, though he was touched that his mother already seemed concerned for his well-being.

“This? Hah! It's nothing but a torn sleeve.”

“...No, I mean, HOLY CROW! LOOK AT THAT THING ON YOUR ARM!”

Owain was starting to wonder if there was an insect on him or something, but then he realised the significance of that specific part of his arm.

“Oh right! Sorry. Guess I should have shown you before-“

“Lissa, are you unharmed?”

Apparently his father had noticed the danger his mother had been in too, but he must have been at the other side of the clearing with the rest of the Shepherds and had further to run than Owain. Even though Lon’qu was a bit late to the party, Owain was delighted to see the concern his parents showed for each other, though Lon’qu was still hovering awkwardly around his mother rather than embracing her like Owain thought he might. Admittedly, Lissa was a little too preoccupied to really pay attention to her husband, since she was still staring at Owain’s arm.

“I’m fine, Lon’qu, but his arm! Look at his arm!”

Owain’s father did as he was told, though he didn’t seem too interested in what he saw there.

“The brand of the exalt? If he is your son, then why shouldn’t it be there?”

“Wait, you don’t know?”

His parents both looked at him after his exclamation, Lon’qu with a mildly irritated expression and Lissa with something a little guiltier, but Owain’s world was crashing down around him. After a minute or two of both Owain and Lissa silently processing their new revelations, Lon’qu finally gave in and asked why they were both so disturbed by this turn of events.

“I- I don’t have the brand, Lon’qu. Chrom does, and so do his kids, and Emm- Well, you know. But mine…”

“Mother’s brand never appeared. She told me as much, said it always weighed on her... You should have seen how happy she was the day mine appeared! She was sobbing and laughing for an hour without pause! But you- how did you not know about this?”

Lon’qu’s face had gone bright red, and he seemed to be looking pointedly at anything other than Lissa and Owain.

“What may or may not be on Lissa’s body is none of my business!”

“None of your-! But you’re married! I have Mother’s ring, look at the signet ring upon my finger! Behold, a perfect match to hers!”

His mother had apparently recovered enough from the shock of the brand to look at his ring, but for the first time since he’d found them, Owain was realising that neither of his parents were wearing one.

“Aww, this is a nice ring! Is this the one you were gonna give me, Lon’qu?”

“I’m not certain. Basilio gave it to me the morning of the wedding, and I haven’t looked at it since.”

Owain no longer had any clue what was going on. Neither of his parents wore rings, and yet they discussed a wedding with complete disinterest, like it hadn’t been one of the best days of their lives. All of this was wrong, and he was desperate to try and get his head around it all, but he couldn’t help but be distracted by his mother leaning against his father’s side, before asking if that was ‘too much’, whatever that meant. As if that wasn’t strange enough, Lon’qu nodded sharply, and Lissa moved away from him without any further comments. It was as if his parents were more like awkward strangers than the deeply loving couple who had raised him, and Owain was starting to get a headache trying to figure out what was happening in front of him. He hadn’t even realised that he was zoning out until his mother waved a hand in front of his face, looking at him curiously.

“Umm, are you ok- Wait, we didn’t even ask you what your name is! I’m so sorry, we must be terrible parents-“

“No!”

His parents looked at him with concerned expressions (or at least his mother did while his father looked slightly less stoic than usual) at his outburst, but he couldn’t help it.

“You were the best parents! I'm more proud of my bloodline than anything in the world! When I remember I'm your son, I feel unstoppable, and the parents I knew felt the same when they were together!”

With that, Owain decided that he’d had enough. As much as he had adored his parents, this version of them were confusing him, and all he could think to do now was storm off in search of his companions from their original world, and hope that one of them might be able to give him some answers about what in the name of the Gods had happened here to make the closest couple he had ever met seem like they barely knew each other.

 

\---

 

Lon’qu still hadn’t entirely recovered from his interactions with his son earlier in the day by the time he retired to the tent he shared with Lissa for the night. Even without the strangeness surrounding the conversation they’d had, he was reeling over the fact that in some alternate world, he had produced a child with a woman he had pointedly avoided marrying. Since Lucina’s arrival, the Shepherds had accepted the concept of the future children, but Lon’qu hadn’t even considered that he might be amongst their parents.

The boy, whose name was Owain according to Lucina, clearly resembled them both, had the brand to prove that he was Ylissean royalty, and from what Lon’qu remembered of the ring he’d been shown it matched the one Basilio had given Lon’qu for his wife. He hadn’t found out more than that, since he’d felt a need to retreat and process this information, but as far as he knew Lissa had spent the rest of the day tracking down the other future children to ask them about their son. In the time he’d spent with Lissa, he’d found that despite her fits of sulkiness and frankly questionable sense of humour, she had a great capacity for kindness, and it didn’t surprise him that she had been a good parent in that other world. What had surprised him was the fact that Owain had thought that his father was a good parent too, when Lon’qu had never imagined that he would even want children, let alone raise them well.

Before he could think more on the subject, though, he noticed what sounded like a muffled sob coming from the other side of the curtain. He had known that Lissa had come back to their tent for the night, but she hadn’t spoken to him much since she had told him their sons name over dinner, and he didn’t know what had upset her enough to be crying in the middle of the night. Contrary to popular belief, he wasn’t actually heartless, and he knew Lissa well enough by now that he was sort of exasperatedly fond of her. Also, he wouldn’t be able to sleep if he could hear her crying, and his mind settled on the more practical reason for his intervention as he made his way around the dividing curtain to her side of the tent.  

“Lissa?”

The sobbing noises stopped immediately, and Lissa sat up to look at him, rubbing at her eyes in an attempt to remove the evidence of her tears. It really wasn’t working, and he couldn’t help but feel sorry for her as she wrapped herself in her blanket and gave him her familiar fake smile.

“Hey, Lon’qu! You ok?”

“I am, but clearly you are not.”

She gave up trying to look happy after that, and it didn’t take long for her to start crying again. Lon’qu barely knew what to do with women at all, let alone crying ones, but he had seen enough battles to know how people might comfort each other after loved ones had fallen. He’d never been in that situation himself, or at least not since his childhood, and he had to grit his teeth to bring himself to go through with it, but somehow he managed to get close enough to Lissa to awkwardly put his arms around her.

Almost instantly, Lissa settled into the embrace, and before Lon’qu could have considered moving away, she was sobbing into his shoulder. Even if he’d still wanted to go back to his side of the tent after that, which he wasn’t sure he did, then it was unlikely that he could move without a distraught princess falling face-first into the floor, and he had literally joined the Shepherds to avoid that kind of diplomatic incident. All he could do was wait for her to finish crying, and then try and get to the bottom of the cause for her distress. It took a while, but eventually she managed to stop long enough to speak, and somehow her first thoughts were for his comfort rather than hers.

“T-too much?”

The fact that she would worry about his boundaries while she was so distressed showed her kindness once again. Despite the fact that it was the closest he’d been to another human in literally years, he shook his head.

“No. Now tell me what happened.”

She relaxed a little, turning her head so that it rested on his shoulder instead of being pressed against it.

“It’s Owain… I spent all day tracking down the other kids, and all they could tell me was how much he loved us, and how sad he was after we died. My own niece, Cynthia, not Lucina, let it slip that he actually saw both of us die in his world. He must have been so scared, so alone…”

That set off her tears again, though Lon’qu couldn’t judge her for it. Owain had seemed a little strange, and Lon’qu still wasn’t sure what to make of the boy, but no child should ever have to witness the death of their parents, especially if they had been killed in battle, which seemed likely.

“I can’t imagine it was easy for him, but he wasn’t alone. The children all supposedly came to our world together, so he at least had his companions.”

“I guess… I just wish we’d been there for him…”

Lon’qu understood what she meant, though Owain seemed to have come through the struggles of his past with remarkable resilience. Even from the little he had seen of his son, he knew that Owain must be an accomplished warrior, though he supposed that Lissa may well have reason to worry about the boy’s emotional stability. He hadn’t handled the news that his parents weren’t married too well, after all, and despite Owain’s insistence on introducing himself, he’d then proceeded to avoid Lon’qu and Lissa all day.

If anyone had asked Lon’qu a month ago what he thought of the idea of settling down and having children, he would have laughed at them, and then gone to stab something to forget the idea. His only goal in life had been to keep his position as champion, and fight on behalf of his Khan. Now, though, he was finding himself emotionally attached to a boy he’d literally only spoken to for about ten minutes, just because he claimed to be Lon’qu’s son. At least Lissa seemed just as affected by Owain as Lon’qu felt, if not more so, and despite any reservations he’d had in the past, he realised that he wanted to be there for this strange boy, and for the boy’s mother.

“We can’t help what happened to us in his world, but in this one, we will stand by him. He won’t be alone again.”

“Yeah… We’re gonna be the best parents. Thanks, Lon’qu.”

Lissa smiled at him, and for once Lon’qu forgot to be afraid of the warmth he felt towards the woman in his arms. For once he didn’t feel uncomfortable in her presence, and even as she fell asleep in his embrace, he couldn’t bring himself to let her go. Somehow, over the time they had spent together, he had become closer to her than he’d thought possible, and her dedication to her training and the care she’d shown towards their son had only endeared her even more to him. Not only that, but the care she had taken to accommodate his own eccentricities with no real explanation had been a relatively simple adjustment for her, but incredibly meaningful for him. Very few people tried to understand him the way that Lissa had, and even fewer managed to go through with it after actually holding a conversation with him, but she had persisted, and it had worked.

It wasn’t until the next morning, when Lissa had long since gone to help Maribelle and Cordelia take inventory of their healing supplies, that he realised what had happened. Lon’qu, Champion of the West, famed for his lack of emotions and his inability to function around women, had fallen in love with one. More specifically, he’d fallen in love with a woman who had never wanted to marry him, and had outright laughed at the idea of raising a child with him.

What in the name of the Gods was he supposed to do now?

 

\---

 

As soon as Owain had woken up to face his first full day amongst this world’s Shepherds, he regretted the way he had acted the day before. His time with his parents had been so fleeting, and to have a second chance to know them was truly a blessing from Naga herself, yet he had run away from them. Granted, he had been surprised by the fact that they weren’t married yet, but when he had heard the circumstances that had led to this moment, it made a little more sense. In Owain’s world, his parents had met during the war with Plegia, and had time to get to know each other naturally, rather than being forced into a match in a way that wouldn’t suit either of their temperaments.

Now he could see the benefits of such a situation, that he had the chance to see the relationship between his parents grow into the loving partnership he had admired so much. When he’d pointed this out to the other members of the Justice Cabal, they had agreed that it was a great opportunity to observe the character development of such legendary heroes. Inigo, who just happened to be walking past, had laughed at him and called him a hopeless romantic, but it wasn’t like he had any dignity left to stand on when it came to relationships, so Owain had ignored him.

Of course, in order to observe his parents’ budding relationship, he first had to find them. After a while of wandering around the camp looking for whichever of his noble ancestors he could find first, he tracked his father to the training grounds set up a little outside the camp itself. Realistically, he should have known to check there first, but it had been so long since he had been able to spend time with his father that he had perhaps lost track of his habits. Still, it would do him no good to focus on things like that, and so Owain stood by and watched his father training, waiting for an opening to get his attention. What he hadn’t expected was for Lon’qu to notice him almost immediately, and for the first time since Owain had been a toddler, his father stopped mid-move to greet his son.

“Owain.”

Ok, so coming from anyone else that might have been a terrible attempt at a greeting, but Owain had known his father well enough to read the meaning behind it. Even the fact that his father had greeted him by name rather than some kind of non-verbal sound of acknowledgment showed that he was really trying.

“Greetings, noble Father! I had hoped to find you here.”

“I am… glad to see you.”

Actually at this point, his father was being so obviously friendly by his standards that it was almost freaking Owain out. Sure, Lon’qu’s standards for friendliness did not set a high bar, but when Owain considered that this version of Lon’qu didn’t know his son, and wasn’t even all that attached to his mother, it was an incredible show of feeling, and for once Owain had nothing to say.

“Perhaps… would you like to train with me?”

“I would be honoured to even be considered as a sparring partner for a fabled warrior such as yourself!”

Most his parent’s generation had been more than a little confused by his way of expressing himself, but Lon’qu simply smiled faintly for about a second, which for him may as well have been a grin. Before his father’s mood could change, Owain took his place opposite him, and bowed dramatically as he always had when they sparred, though for a moment he was worried that his father would think it was strange. After a moment, however, Lon’qu nodded in response, and they began.

For the first time since Owain’s parents had died, he had a real sense of familiarity, almost a feeling of home. Perhaps it might be considered unusual, but he never felt more comfortable than when he crossed swords with his father. It seemed that Lon’qu was enjoying the challenge as much as Owain, as there were very few members of the Shepherds who practised the Chon’sinese methods of swordplay that Lon’qu had passed down to his son. Still, no matter how much Owain had trained, his father still bested him, and he was prepared to acknowledge his defeat as graciously as he could manage before Lon’qu spoke up.

“You fight well. Perhaps you even have the makings of a Champion.”

Owain couldn’t help tearing up a little at his father’s praise, since it had been so long since he’d been able to share in training with Lon’qu, and to have earned his respect already meant the world to him.

“I was taught by the best Champion Ferox ever saw in its long and storied history, and wanted nothing more than to follow in his path.”

“You are young, and skilled. Perhaps one day, you will surpass this Champion you speak of, and forge your own path.”

Even though Lon’qu must have realised Owain spoke of him, the tone of his voice was genuine, and Owain’s heart swelled. Before he could really think it through, he threw his arms around his father, somehow managing to avoid the sword in his hand, and to Owain’s surprise his father returned his embrace, albeit after freezing up for a moment.

“I’m sorry, Father, I didn’t think-“

“Don’t worry. Your mother has been assisting me in becoming more comfortable with physical contact.”

So his parents had spent enough time together to allow Lon’qu to begin coping with being casually touched, which Owain understood to have been the most difficult part of their courtship. Even through his joyous reaction to his father’s praise, Owain was beginning to see hope regarding his parent’s relationship. He had a vested interest in ensuring that they got together, after all and when he had more time he would have to consider this further. For now, though, he simply planned to enjoy the time he had with them.

“Say, Father, how do you feel about naming your weapons?”

 


	6. Too Much? - Part 2

Ever since Lon’qu had given her a strangely-out-of-character pep-talk about parenting, Lissa had been determined to spend as much time with her son as possible. Sure, there was something really weird about the concept of her child turning up almost her age, claiming that his father was a guy who barely even let Lissa touch him, let alone- well, Lon’qu had been very insistent about not marrying her or sharing a tent, but it was impossible not to like Owain. They hadn’t been able to spend as much time together as Lissa would have liked, since they were still in the middle of a war, but the moments they did manage to find just meant all the more this way.

She was still holding out hope that they would be able to find a time where Lon’qu could join them too, and they could be together as whatever strange kind of family they were, but the Shepherd’s schedules didn’t tend to be that convenient. Maybe it was for the best though, since no matter how much closer Lon’qu and Lissa had become since their ruined wedding, things could still get very awkward between them, and every time Owain witnessed one of those moments he looked all sad. She figured that he’d had enough grief in his life without his parents making it worse, which was the main motivation for her sitting through a whole morning of him trying to convince her to name her weapon. They’d made it through about half of his list before she’d been distracted by one of the other pages in the book he had with him, and somehow they’d ended up reading that instead.

“This is amazing! You know more about my friends than I do!”

“I pride myself on possessing the best descriptions of our most noble heroes. Every detail I could find, everything my companions could tell me about their parents, the few history books that survived Grima’s wrath… All of it is here, in my Justice Manual.”

Lissa flipped through a couple of the pages, and Owain hadn’t been kidding about the quality of the descriptions. Even just glancing at what he’d written about the Shepherds showed the detail he had gone to, finding out everything from their birthdays, to their signature fighting style, their height, their rank, everything right down to the day they died. In fact, she couldn’t bring herself to read those last parts. As much as she admired her son’s work, it was too difficult to find out how the people she held most dear had passed away. Still, she was determined to show nothing but enthusiasm for what Owain had managed to put together, and it really was incredible.

“Did you have any plans for this? You must have spent so long putting it together, I can’t believe how much stuff you found!”

“I thought… perhaps, when the war was over, I might turn it into a history of the Shepherds. The heroes who died to protect us and our people… They deserved recognition.”

It was strange to hear something so serious from her son, and once again her heart broke for him. Some part of her still couldn’t quite believe that there was another world where she was dead, along with her brother and their friends, though when she thought of Emmeryn she supposed that she shouldn’t be so surprised.

“I think that was a great idea, Owain. And hey, maybe you should write it anyway! I think that maybe the other kids might appreciate it. It’s nice to be able to remember people.”

They both sat in silence for a moment, and while Owain was no doubt thinking about far more terrible things than she could imagine, he still had a faint smile on his face, as if he was determined to remember the good things instead.

“Do you ever wonder what you were like, in my world?”

“I mean… I’ve thought about it. But I didn’t wanna make you-“

The smile on her son’s face widened, and Lissa couldn’t help but smile back at him.

“Fear not, Mother. I will not speak of any distressing subjects, merely give an account of your noble life.”

It was tempting, to know what she’d done in her other lifetime, as weird as that whole idea was. Besides, Owain clearly wanted to be able to talk to someone about it, someone who didn’t know enough about that future to bring up any uncomfortable subjects for either of them, but who cared enough to listen to him talk about his own life instead of just the war. They’d all had just about enough of the war talk by now, even if it was helpful for planning the fighting going on in the world they were all living in right now. Still, that was far too confusing for her to want to think of right now, when she could be listening to her son telling stories he was clearly passionate about, and hearing the happiness in his voice as he spoke of his childhood, she couldn’t help but think that her other self must have been delighted by the family she had built.

Perhaps, if she was very lucky, Lissa could somehow do the same.

 

\---

 

Lon’qu had known that Owain was a little unsubtle about his desire for his parents to be actually married, instead of vaguely connected in whatever awkward relationship they had, but really he hadn’t expected this level of determination. There were some ruins near the Shepherd’s current campsite, and when his son had discovered that his parents were both free at the same time as him for once, he’d suggested that they all go and explore them together. Frankly, it had all seemed like unnecessary frivolity to him, but Owain had seemed so excited about it, and Lissa as well, that he couldn’t bring himself to refuse the two of them.

Of course, neither he or Lissa had expected their son to show them into a tower room, then close the door and bar it behind them so that they were stuck there. He must then have run off or determined to remain silent, because there was no response to their shouts for him to release them, and when Lon’qu attempted to break the door down, Lissa made him stop in case he hurt himself, and in light of his recent realisation of his feelings, he didn’t have the heart to upset her. Besides, Owain must have found a very efficient way of keeping the door closed, since it was hardly the first door Lon’qu had attempted to break down, but this one had shown no signs of movement.

“It appears that we are trapped.”

 “Looks like it!”

Lissa, somewhat unsurprisingly, seemed more amused than annoyed at this situation, and as they settled themselves on the floor of their new prison, Lon’qu decided that he was at least not upset by it.

“I hope our son sees fit to let us out of this room before night falls.”

“Aww, I bet he’s hanging around somewhere nearby. It’s not like we can stay mad at him, anyway.”

She had a point, though he couldn’t help muttering something under his breath about his willingness to try. That just made Lissa glare at him, though, and besides it really was difficult to get angry with Owain.

“Perhaps.”

“Look at it this way, at least you won’t get talked into trying one of his special moves for a while.”

True, Owain’s determination to enforce his… unique fighting style on anyone who would listen to him long enough to hear the full explanation could get a little repetitive. Still, Lon’qu was prepared to accept that as part of his son’s strange charm. He would defend Owain from anyone who questioned him in a heartbeat, as long as he himself managed to avoid running into battle shouting something about a holy rock, or whatever Owain’s particular phrase of the week might be.

“I suppose. On the plus side, now that I’ve named my sword, he seems more lenient.”

“Heh, you had that conversation too? I thought his list of names would never end.”

Lissa giggled at that, which was the most adorable thing Lon’qu had ever seen, as well as the first thing he’d ever thought of as adorable in his life.

“Indeed. It was… extensive.”

“It sure was. I ended up ignoring them all in the end anyway, and then we got distracted by stories about the other me.”

While Lissa’s tone was still light, he could tell that she was keeping something back, something that she considered upsetting. Realistically, that wasn’t surprising, considering the state of the world Owain had left, though he could assume that she was thinking of something in particular. He wasn’t sure whether he should ask her about it or not, and so he remained silent, watching her face to try and figure out if she was expecting a response. It didn’t take long for her to elaborate on the situation, however.

“I was the Exalt for a while, apparently. Owain said I was good at it, but I’m not sure I believe him… I don’t even have the stupid brand, and I never wanted to rule. Anyway, he never actually said it, but for that to have happened then Chrom-“

She gave up on her explanation after that, which didn’t surprise him. Lon’qu knew full well that she had unresolved issues surrounding the death of her sister, despite the fact that she was usually determined to avoid speaking about the topic, without considering the death of her brother too. Instead of waiting for her to speak on the subject anymore, he reached out cautiously to hold her hand, and after a minute or so she seemed to calm down, at least a little.

“Now I think about it, you never told me anything about your family?” 

Apparently they hadn’t left the topic behind entirely, then, though it wasn’t too sensitive a topic for him by now.

“My parents died when I was a child, and I had no siblings.”

“Oh… I’m sorry…”

He shook his head, not wanting Lissa to think she’d upset him.

“Don’t be. I hardly remember them now. Besides, Basilio took me in a year or so later.”

“So he’s kind of like your dad? That’s sweet!”

It wasn’t her usual level of enthusiasm, perhaps, but she at least seemed to be cheering up a little. Naturally, though, the atmosphere couldn’t remain cheerful for long when he was in the room, despite Lissa’s best efforts at keeping the conversation going. Unfortunately, it took a turn he didn’t appreciate.

“When I was talking to Owain, he told me you named your sword Ke’ri? He didn’t seem to know the name, and I don’t either, and between us we must have read just about every book of legends and fables on the continent. I guess she must have been important, but if you didn’t have a sister or anything, I can’t think of a reason…”

Lon’qu could only assume that the expression on his face must be as grim as his thoughts on hearing that name again, and Lissa looked vaguely alarmed by it. If it had been anyone else who had asked him, then he would happily have ignored them, but Lissa… Damn his feelings, he didn’t especially want to explain himself, but he knew he was going to.

“After my parents died, I spent a while living in the slums at the edge of the town I grew up in. There was a girl who befriended me. That was Ke’ri...”

As he explained the rest of the story, the death of his friend, his failure to protect her, the resulting guilt that drove him out of Chon’sin to find his place at Basilio’s side, Lissa just watched him quietly. Once he was done, however, he couldn’t bring himself to meet her eyes, and so he didn’t expect her to throw her arms around him.

“Too much?”

He shook his head, though given that his chin was now resting on Lissa’s head, he was hoping that she had understood the gesture despite not being able to see it. Somehow, even after discussing his past, after explaining the root of his discomfort with female proximity, he didn’t want to push Lissa away. They just stayed there, in each other’s arms, and despite his previous reservations, despite being locked inside a random tower with no real idea of when they would be released, there was nowhere else he would rather be.

 

\---

 

After they’d been freed from the tower, which had involved a lot of very fake sounding apologies from Owain and a lot of amusement from the other Shepherds when the story got out, Lissa couldn’t stop thinking about what Lon’qu had told her about. Honestly, she was starting to think that traumatic memories were the thread holding this family together, which was a stupid but sadly common side effect of the war they were all living through, whether it was for the first time or the second.

Still, something in particular about the story of Ke’ri was making Lissa feel extra terrible. Everyone had assumed that Lon’qu just didn’t really like women, not that he was actually afraid of getting emotionally attached to them. She supposed that it explained how good he’d always been at dealing with her response to Emmeryn’s death, if he’d lost someone he loved dearly too, though she really hated that one of the main things they had in common involved people dying.

When she really thought about it, though, there was plenty she liked about Lon’qu besides the sad stuff. Sure, there was also the weird stuff, most of which involved sharp objects, but there was more to him than stabbing, too. It was the little things, like his determination to always sit cross-legged wherever he was, and the way he’d quietly ask for her help if he struggled reading his orders, how hard he was trying to be a good father to Owain. The things that other people, who were mostly too nervous to get close to him, didn’t get to see like she did.

Even though they’d started off with horrible awkwardness and been forced to spend time together at first, now Lissa actually really enjoyed spending time with him. Sure, he was kind of ridiculous, but secretly, very deep down, he was actually a really good man. Maybe, if they still had to get married after all this, it would be better than just tolerable. Maybe they might actually manage to enjoy it.

“Lissa? Lissa, darling, I’ve been trying to get your attention for far too long. Are you alright?”

“Hmm? Oh, I’m fine! Just thinking.”

Maribelle just raised an eyebrow at her. Sure, it was the first time in a while that Lissa hadn’t been too occupied with Lon’qu or Owain to have tea with her best friend, but she got distracted easily these days.

“Well don’t strain yourself.”

“Wha- Hey!”

Her friend smirked at her, with only a little bit of apology in her expression, and Lissa guessed that she deserved it.

“Forgive me, darling, but I hardly see you these days! Spending time with your son, I understand, since Naga only knows how long I’ve spent trying to work on Brady, but you do insist on following that man you were supposed to marry around.”

“Maybe I do, but Lon’qu needs me around.”

The look on Maribelle’s face was more confused than it had been before, with a small amount of pity mixed in there too, and Lissa didn’t really know what to make of that.

“Lon’qu is a grown man, Lissa. He shouldn’t need your constant attention, if he’s going to be a functional adult.”

“Maybe, but what if I want to give him attention?”

At that comment, the look on Maribelle’s face cleared, and she went back to smirking at Lissa.

“I see.”

“What? What do you see?”

Maribelle laughed quietly, shaking her head at Lissa like she was missing some big joke or something. What it was, she didn’t know, but if it was that amusing then she wanted to find out.

“Come on, tell me!”

“I think I’d better let you figure this one out yourself, darling. Now, drink your tea before it gets cold.”

That seemed mean, but Maribelle was determined, so there was nothing Lissa could do but drink the stupid tea, and she got her revenge by adding sugar until Maribelle had that look that meant she was being too polite to tell Lissa off.

 

\---

 

Lissa’s conversation with Maribelle stayed stuck in her head for the next few days. She still hadn’t worked out what her friend had been hinting at, unless there was really nothing there and it was a creative punishment for not spending as much time with her lately, but really, Maribelle was just as occupied with her family. Besides, now that they were meeting more and more of the Valmese forces, it seemed like no one in the Shepherds had any time for anything besides their duties.

It was her first free night in over a week, since the healers had all been working overtime as the number of battles and other assorted combat situations increased. Honestly, they couldn’t go anywhere these days without being ambushed by bandits, attacked by Risen, or on one memorable occasion having a bear stampede through the camp in the middle of the night. Everyone was exhausted, and therefore crankier than usual. If Sumia and the other cheerier members of the Shepherds were only just starting to be annoying, the people who were already strict or annoying were downright unbearable.

That was why she was prepared to snap when someone ran up to her tent, because she’d been looking forward to a nap while Lon’qu was out and therefore there were less random sharp objects hidden all over her tent, but apparently it wasn’t to be. As soon as she saw who it was, though, and more importantly what state they were in, her concerns went out of the window, or would have done if their tent had one.

“Owain? What’s wrong?”

“It’s Father, we were ambushed, and they had arrows, and they shot him and Gods this is how it happened in my world if he dies now it’ll be my fault again-“

All she picked up out of that was ‘father’, ‘shot’, and ‘died’, which was almost enough to make her collapse out of sheer panic, but somehow she managed to repress that in order to be the healer Owain likely needed.

“Are you hurt, Owain?”

The tone of voice that she reserved for stubborn people who didn’t think they needed a healer seemed to snap him out of his panic long enough to tell her that she wasn’t hurt, and he then pulled himself together enough to go and alert Chrom and Robin to the ambush situation. That just left Lissa to deal with whatever state Lon’qu was in, and it was really best that she didn’t think about that too much until she saw him, so all she could do was run for the healing tent and hope she wasn’t too late.

“Lon’qu, where are you?”

“Here.”

He was at the back of the tent, on one of the furthest beds because of course he couldn’t make this easy for her. For a second, she could barely see him through the tears of sheer relief building in her eyes, because if he was well enough to respond with that level of irritation in his voice, then he was probably not about to die as quickly as Owain had feared.

Actually, Owain had kind of exaggerated the injuries Lon’qu had sustained, because all she could see was an arrow lodged in his shoulder. Sure, that wasn’t a good thing, but it wouldn’t be too difficult to heal, and it was very unlikely to kill him. As soon as she realised that, she could relax and hold back her tears long enough to treat him. For now, he was just another patient, and getting answers could wait until she was done. It was a matter of routine to get the arrow out, and grab her stave and work her magic, but as soon as that was done she finally started crying.

“Lissa?”

“Oh don’t you sound worried about me! Not when you were the one who just got shot!”

That was when she gave up on talking altogether, and she was vaguely aware of him watching her with concern as she cried out her stress. For a couple of minutes she had been really afraid that she was going to lose him, and she was so relieved that it hadn’t been as major an injury as she’d feared.

“I’m all right, Lissa.”

“Well of course you’re alright now I’ve healed you! But what if you hadn’t made it back in time? What if you hadn’t been so lucky, and the arrow had hit you in the chest instead of the shoulder? You could have died, you idiot!”

He still looked concerned, but he was starting to look a little bit confused too. Of course, it was a little bit hard to tell as she tried to wipe her eyes clear now that she’d stopped outright sobbing, but she was pretty sure she was reading him right.

“Any of us could die at any moment. We’re soldiers in the middle of a war, and that comes with risks. Besides, our son is safe, and that is what matters.”

“Yes, keeping Owain safe is important, but you matter too, Lon’qu!”

Honestly Lissa could hardly understand how relaxed he seemed about the idea of his own death. Yes, they were at war, but if people were that expendable then no one would bother learning to heal, let alone bond with the people they fought beside.

“I wouldn’t like Owain to lose another father, and I suppose Basilio is sensitive enough that he might regret my death, but-“

“Stop talking about your death like it’s some stupid thing no one would care about! We need you, Lon’qu, the Shepherds need you, your son needs you, I need-“

She stopped mid-sentence, because she’d suddenly realised what she was about to say. She needed him. Maybe that was what Maribelle had been talking about, it must have been, because she knew that it was true. Somehow, through all the time they’d spent together, she’d fallen in love with this man, and looking at him now she wondered how she hadn’t noticed sooner.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t want to upset you.”

“It’s not like you could avoid being hurt, I just… I couldn’t bear losing anyone else I love.”

Lon’qu’s eyes widened very slightly as she mentioned love, but it wasn’t the look of fear that she’d half expected as soon as she finished talking. Instead there was something soft, almost vulnerable in his expression, and something about it made her reach out to place her hands on his cheeks so that she could see it more clearly.

“…Too much?”

“No…”

He smiled at her hesitantly, but for the first time since she’d been introduced to him, he seemed truly glad to be with her. In that moment, all of the stress, the worry, the frustration of her situation seemed to disappear, and she couldn’t help moving a little closer to him. When Lon’qu didn’t back away, she closed the rest of the distance between them, and she kissed him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A special thank you to Queenvonkarma for beta'ing this, and thanks to anyone who may read it.   
> If anyone is coming here from You Didn't Have To Die To Leave a Legacy, I am so sorry for the years I've left it so close to being finished, and I will post the last section one day, I promise. I hope this more cheerful (in places) story is a nice bonus in the meantime :)


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